![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
regains
REGAIN REGISTRY
Sakura Tohsaka
memories
9.20.17: asking [redacted] how he feels having been adopted. 9.28.17: standing before Rider,
her Servant. 10.19.17: seeing Command Spells on [redacted] left hand 10.21.17: being punched by Shinji and promising to give him Rider. 11.6.17: her first time being tortured in the Matou basement 11.9.17: having a nightmare of the Shadow and watching it kill 4 men 12.4.17: passing Rin Tohsaka in the archery room while barely speaking 12.4.17: meeting Saber for the first time 1.4.18: Taiga explaining Shirou's wish to be a superhero. 1.4.18: dinner disaster 1.14.18: overhearing Rin's memory of Shirou. 1.23.18: Asking Shirou if he'd hate her for being evil. 2.10.18: Being angry with Saber. 3.26.18: Lying to Shirou about Shinji's abuse. 4.5.18: Shooting herself with a mana spear. 4.5.18: Haunted Tohsaka Mansion 4.30.18: Rin and Shirou arguing of Sakura's life. 5.13.18: Sakura deciding to ask Zouken to kill her. 5.17.18: Taiga discussing Saskura's measurements to Shirou. 5.24.18: Having a nightmare about the Shadow attacking Rin. 6.16.18: Killing Shinji and going mad. 6.16.18: Rin telling Sakura she should just be a monster.abilities
10.2.17: 40 high quality magic circuits 12.4.17: Archery skills 1.4.18: Imaginary Numbers, Tier 1 (3 mid-sized spirits/1 large spirit) 1.16.18: Water Affinity 2.13.18: Matou Family Spells (Tier II)
6.17.18: Connection to the Root
items
THING THING THINGappearance
12.24.17: Purple hair and eyes THING THING
MEMORY DETAILS
➡ trigger: Discussing with Ami her past life's foster mother
➡ memory: Sakura asks [Shirou] his feelings on being adopted, seeking an answer because she herself was adopted out at age 4 and resents the [Tohsaka] family for giving her up.
Memory 2 | date: 9.28.17
➡ trigger: September Freebie
➡ memory: In the basement of the Matou home, Sakura stands before Rider - her Servant of the [Rider] class, and a type of being who [redacted]. She refers to Sakura as her Master.
Memory 3 | date: 10.19.17
➡ trigger: October Freebie
➡ memory: Sakura sees a light bruise on [Shirou] left hand, the beginning markings of Command Spells given to Masters in the Holy Grail War. As this means he will be her enemy and in danger, Sakura is anxious for the rest of the morning.
Memory 4 | date: 10.21.17
➡ trigger: October Freebie
➡ memory: Shinji barges into the Emiya household, punching Sakura and demanding that she come home. A fight nearly breaks out between him and [Shirou], but Sakura manages to talk him down by insinuating that she'll give him possession of Rider. Her brother agrees to the terms and then leaves.
Memory 5 | date: 11.6.17
➡ trigger: cw for parasites/bugs/mental torture
➡ memory: At age 4, Sakura is thrown into the Matou basement where she receives her fist "lesson" as the Matou heir. It includes being physically and sexually violated by magical insects created by her grandfather. The amount of pain she experiences is indescribable and enough to flatline her grasp on consciousness. The training is also so violent it alters her DNA, later resulting in purple hair and purple eyes.
Memory 6 | date: 11.9.17
➡ trigger: November Freebie
➡ memory: In the dead of night, Sakura follows the Shadow through the city. Four men (whom Sakura refers to as "food") chase after while making sexually explicit comments. Eventually, Sakura and the Shadow run to a nearby park, and she watches as the Shadow consumes the men, leaving a mess of blood and limbs behind. The scene ends with Sakura remarking how she "squashed a bug".
Memory 7 | date: 12.4.17
➡ trigger: Discussing archery with Minato
➡ memory: When entering the archery room for morning practice, Sakura comes across Rin Tohsaka speaking to her archery captain. Immediately upon Sakura's arrival, Rin greets her and then excuses herself. They barely speak a word to each other.
Memory 8 | date: 12.4.17
➡ trigger: December Freebie
➡ memory: While walking home after school, [Shirou] tries to play off the sudden appearance of his new companion, Saber, saying she's from overseas. But Sakura knows Saber is actually a Servant, and that [Shirou] is an official Master of the Holy Grail War, technically making him her enemy.
Memory 9 | date: 1.4.18
➡ trigger: Discussing superheroes with Kara
➡ memory: Shirou comes home late, much to the ire of Taiga, who is worried about the growing dangers of the city. She then explains to Sakura how Shirou is always going out of his way to help others, as it plays into his ideals of being a superhero. Sakura is awed and moved by this dream, and silently recalls how Rin is her own superhero.
Memory 10 | date: 1.4.18
➡ trigger: January Freebie
➡ memory: Determined to cook dinner for Rin, Shirou, and Illya, both as a way to prove herself and combat the fear of her body shutting down, Sakura bullies her way into the kitchen. However, she keeps dropping plates because she has no strength in her hands, completely messes up the food because her sense of taste is gone, and at one point even forgets how to use chopsticks, something she's done her entire life. Dinner ends up a disaster, and she's barred from the kitchen there after.
Memory 11 | date: 1.14.18
➡ trigger: Howard leaves Sakura for Mateus
➡ memory: After having collapsed outside the Emiya household, Sakura is in bed resting from a severe injury she can't remember getting. She is somehow able to hear through the shadows, and listens to Rin recount a memory she has of Shirou. Sakura is overcome with jealousy, having assumed only she had that memory of Shirou, and when Rin warns Shirou he might have to kill her, Sakura descends into a psychotic rage while blaming the world and her sister for her troubles, vowing to kill anyone who tries to harm her.
Memory 12 | date: 1.24.18
➡ trigger: Sakura admits she might be a monster
➡ memory: While speaking with Shirou in a shed at night, Sakura asks him if he could ever forgive her should she turn into a bad person. She asks because she doesn’t know what will happen during the Holy Grail War, and on top of that, deep down she knows how much of a jealous and vindictive person she can be. Shirou says that no, he wouldn't let her get away with that, and in fact would be the first to scold her for her actions. This brings Sakura peace, knowing someone she trusts will keep her in line, and she smiles contently.
Memory 13 | date: 2.13.18
➡ trigger: February Freebie
➡ memory: One day, Shirou comes home late with Saber, and he is injured. In a blind fury, Sakura blames Saber for all of Shirou's sudden disappearances at night, though she feigns innocence as to why. The truth is she knows Shirou is participating in the war somehow but she can't stop him without outing herself as a mage, and so she vents her frustration his Servant, the one meant to protect him. However, Sakura is just as quick to apologize from guilt.
Memory 14 | date: 3.25.18
➡ trigger: March Freebie
➡ memory: Sakura is in the kitchen acting super lively until Shirou realizes the reason is because her brother punched her, and she’s trying to cover it up by acting like everything is okay. The truth is Shinji had just lost the rights as Master the night before and was ridiculed by Zouken, so he took his aggression out on Sakura by abusing her. Sakura lies to not only cover for her brother, but to make it sound like she doesn’t know what’s going on. Shirou finding out the truth would mean she might never see him again.
Memory 15 | date: 4.5.18
➡ trigger: Accidentally shooting Byakuya with her mana spears
➡ memory: Sakura falls to the floor, screaming as if in pain after she is doused in an unknown liquid that was held in her earring. Her body is desperately craving mana, and her Servant, Medusa, announces she will allow Sakura to kill Rin and Shirou because it's the only way for Sakura to survive. Sakura (despite her protests) instinctively casts a spell that targets Rin, her rival and the stronger mage, only for Shirou to shove the girl out of the way, and so Sakura rebounds her spell on herself out of grief for hurting someone she loves.
Memory 16 | date: 4.5.18
➡ trigger: April Freebie
➡ memory: While walking Sakura home, Shirou and her discuss the Tohsaka mansion and how it’s said that an evil sorcerer used to live there -- or at the very least, that it's haunted. However, Sakura denies that she and Rin are familiar with each other, even though they’re neighbors, and insists she was always too afraid to go to near the house. She doesn't tell Shirou that they're sisters who are forbidden from speaking to each other.
Memory 17 | date: 4.30.18
➡ trigger: April Freebie
➡ memory: Sitting on a table inside of a church, Sakura overhears Shirou and Rin in the next room, arguing over whether or not to kill her. Rin insists it's a kindness and also her duty as a mage to kill her sister, as Sakura will go mad under Zouken's influence and start indiscriminately killing others, while Sihrou says they can't judge her for crimes she hasn't committed yet. Sobbing, Sakura breaks the church window and runs away.
Memory 18 | date: 5.13.18
➡ trigger: Talking to Shinji about his suicide memory
➡ memory: After Shirou leaves her in her room because [redacted], Sakura decides she will go confront her Grandfather and ask him to kill her. Not only does she assume she'll die anyway, but she feels as if she’s broken Shirou by having him become her superhero, instead of being the type of man who'd try to save everyone. In the dark, she uses her last command spell so that Rider will protect Shirou from all harm.
Memory 19 | date: 5.17.18
➡ trigger: Elda discussing Sakura's breast size
➡ memory: Being allowed to stay over Shirou’s house, she goes to Taiga asking for a change of clothes, which of course means Taiga teases Sakura over her breast size in front of Shirou. At one point Sakura even tackles Taiga trying to cover her mouth so she won’t say anything else, and then escapes with such quickness that she runs into a wall.
Memory 20 | date: 5.24.18
➡ trigger: May Freebie
➡ memory: A memory Sakura experiences through her Shadow, which is in the park, along with Shirou, Rin, her grandfather, Saber, and a Servant she doesn't recognize. With its shadow tendrils, the Shadow attacks Rin – an instinctive move that is a result of hurt and spite, and attempt to remove someone whom Sakura feels has wronged her. However, Shirou jumps in the line of fire and so the Shadow retracts the attack, disappearing soon after. Sakura wakes up in a cold sweat back in the Emiya residence, thinking what happened was a dream.
Memory 21 | date: 6.16.18
➡ trigger: Shinji and Sakura confronting a terrible memory
➡ memory: Realizing that Shinji will never return to the brother she once loved, Sakura wishes he would stop existing and the Shadow kills him. Sakura immediately goes mad upon realizing that she is the Shadow that has been rampaging through the city. Her Grandfather bids her to accept the Shadow, and she does as bid
Memory 22 | date: 6.16.18
➡ trigger: Purchased Memory
➡ memory: In a place she does not recognize, Sakura battles her sister, though she slowly becomes confused and frightened. She is supposed to have the upper hand in this fight, as she can continuously generate giant, black shadows... except it isn't working. Rin has a sword that keeps destroying the shadows, and goes as far to explain that the reason it works is because [redacted]. Furious, Sakura starts screaming 10+ years of frustration, only for her sister to reply coldly that she never tried to understand Sakura's pain, and isn't going to, either. It's because of Sakura's weakness she turned into a monster.
MEMORY DETAILS - PEOPLE/EVENTS/TERMS
➡ Sakura Matou: Sakura is aware of her appearance (the purple hair and eyes), and that she was a sad, lonely girl who was given up for adoption at the age of four by the Tohsaka family. Is also frightened/frustrated that Matou is unstable to the point that she will watch the Shadow kill people, even though Sakura knows the girl is just afraid. But it does make it harder to sympathize given how easily she can see Matou turning destructive in her own bitterness. Recently suspects the girl might be dying, or just completely crazy. Is also aware that Matou was dangerous enough that her past life's sister wanted to kill her to ensure there would not be victims.
➡ Shirou: Aware of his existence, his name, and his appearance. Can assume Matou cares about him, as she was upset he's her enemy in the War. Apparently his dream is to become a superhero, and Sakura can't help but find that charming. For some reason, he is warned by Rin that he should kill her, but was very adamant that he try to save her. Also regained a memory of Matou lamenting that by trying to save her, he effectively gave up on his dream to be a hero to all.
➡ Rin: aware of appearance, can assume she is technically identical to her AU!Sister. Matou and her Rin do not seem to be close, nor were they allowed to speak to one another growing up. Sakura has discovered this is probably because Rin was chosen as the Tohsaka heir, and Matou was given away. In fact, Rin has insisted she will kill her sister, and Sakura is extremely upset by this. On top of this, Sakura has noticed that the Shadow keeps targeting Rin in her Matou's nightmares.
➡ Shinji: Aware of his existence, name, and relationship. Knows that he's hit her and considers her property. She remembers giving him ownership of Rider for some reason, most likely so she wouldn't have to fight Shirou.
➡ Rider: Aware of her name, appearance, and relationship. Knows that her true name is Medusa and she is very loyal to Matou.
➡ Zouken: Matous' grandfather and the one who created the magical bugs that tortured her. For now, she is unaware of his appearance and anything else about him.
➡ Saber: Aware of her appearance, that she's Shirou's Servant. Remembers being angry with her because Shirou kept getting hurt under her watch. All else is unknown.
➡ Taiga: Aware of her appearance. Assumes she is somehow related to Shirou. Remembers Taiga teasing Matou about her breast size in front of Shirou, so Sakura assumes Taiga knew Matou loved Shirou.
➡ Illya: Aware of her appearance and name, but nothing else.
➡ Kariya: Unknown
➡ Holy Grail War: Knows the term. Given how fearful Matou was of Shirou joining in, Sakura assumes survival is low. Also knows that the Grail grants wishes somehow, and the point of the war is to obtain it. Learned from Kei (Kirei) that seven Servants of different classes are summoned to Masters of the Grail's choosing, suggesting a level of sentience.
➡ Servant/Master: Knows the terms, that Servants must be summoned, but no other details.
➡ Matou Magic: Is aware of her magical spears that drain mana (and can kill if left in the victim too long), as is able to manipulate water to a small degree. Also assumes magic bugs must be apart of the family magic from her memories of Zouken. She also knows Matou can summon little spirits, though curiously, she's never seen the ability in a memory.
➡ The Shadow: aware of its appearance and that it consumes humans for nourishment and mana, doesn't know its true identity or where it came from.